Hollaback Girl [Where My Ladies At?]
What does woman mean anyways?
It means a waist that’s small like Barbie’s, like not ever eating what I want. Give me what is green and nothing else. My stomach will be empty and flat and always hungry. It means tan skin that you have to buy. Bring me the bulbs, the lotion, the color I didn’t get from God. And eyes, eyes that stick out black, black, black. Baby girl, we don’t need to see your eyes, we only need to see $16.00 worth of MAC makeup. A perfect nose. Being a woman means you have a perfect nose. Not too big, not too small. Get good plastic if you don’t already have it. A woman’s scent? It smells like honey or flowers, like anything but human, anything but woman.
The woman doesn’t need the brain. She only needs her body. Study less, exercise more. Ladies, get on the treadmill and out of the library.
And the feminists? The terrible feminists that never shave and always quote Jane Austen. Tell them Jane is dead and that the iron is ready. They should be in a kitchen and not on a ladder.
They are always fighting. So much fighting, working, trying so hard. Why are the feminist’s always fighting and never just being? They are always just yelling this and yelling that. They are always holding signs and grudges- but they are not really coming closer to being feminine. Because that’s the point of being a feminist, right?
Being feminine. Lipstick and heels. Lace and pearls. Mascara and perfume.
Femme fatale. Wait, what? Never.
________
What does woman mean anyways?
It means power that is your own. Inherent. Original. Perfect. Power that is selfless and compassionate and not begging for validation. It means knowing who you are and walking in your true identity.
*It also means wanting the same pay as men. Give me the whole dollar, America.
